Journal of Submission

Jan 6th 2001 work in the dungeon

Jan 27th 2001(Jan 28th 1:32 am)

What Mistress Tara called play actually turned into very intense therapy in the new interrogation room.

First i was required to shave off my beard of 23 years. YEAH!!!!

i was then taken to the interrogation room. After a short wait Mistress Tara came back in. Mistress Tara kissed me on each cheek.

i was inspected for cleanliness, and vibrating anal bead were inserted. The beads were about an inch in diameter, on insertion there was a slight pain for each one. Once in i didn't feel them at all. Mistress Tara said i was far more open that she would have expected. She got 3 fingers in easily.

My arms were then bound behind me, my ankles were bound and i was wrapped in ceran wrap. A hood was applied and i was sat down in the old dentists chair. At some point dripping from my penis was wiped with a paper towel and that towel was put in my mouth.

The interrogation began.

Mistress Tara wanted to get to the bottom of what happened. Two other Mistresses held my feet up and She caned the bottom of my feet. Caning on your feet really hurts and gets you attention fast. We went through the whole event. i was beginning to sweat in the ceran wrap. The caning on my feet really hurt.

We went through what's right and wrong, good vs. evil, examples of each.

i was moved to the red dentists chair, my feet were held up again and the interrogation continued. 

It boils down to the following:

i did this because i'm lonely in life and wanted to make friend. That was selfish.

Its ok to feel that way, it was wrong to do what i did. i exploited personal information.

Mistress Tara asked me how it felt to say that, it hurt to say it, it felt good to have said it, not good that i did it. Just getting it out, i felt better.

i was helped to stand, Mistress Tara said LOOK AT ME. Looking at Her she said - Good work, i thought we would have to do this several times. She covered my eyes and mouth and i was led to the isolation chamber.

i was sat in the chamber, head phones but on and the door was closed, i heard a lock being put on the door. i wasn't going anywhere.

The isolation gave me a chance to reflect on what went wrong and where i can do better, be a better person - a better slave. After a while, the door opened, i was checked on and the beads were turned on. A while later i was checked again and the beads where turned off. i was sweating like crazy.

After a while the door opened and i was led back to the red dentists chair and the real interrogation began.

Mistress Tara drilled down hard on right vs. wrong, good vs. evil. She drilled down on what drove me as a person, events in childhood. She was caning my feet really hard. It really hurt. Eventually we got to the cats and the oven cleaner. As the reality of what i did as a kid set into Mistress Tara, i heard the cane drop to the floor and felt Mistress Tara hold me.

i cried and cried and cried.

She forgave me for the cats, said i was innocent, she forgave me for what i did.

i was sobbing

Through my tears, i asked if She would please keep me, She said yes i will keep you, i will keep you forever.

i said ' i love you Mistress Tara ' she responded with ' i love you too. '

i read Mistress Tara my letter, i was almost giddy. i felt like i did really good work and i had made all of the hurtles. i had worked really hard for this and passed the second round of tests.

i told Mistress Tara that i was really scared before it all started, She said 'i was scared for you'

i cleaned up and went home after dropping Mistress Tara off.

i feel like i grew significantly as a person tonight.

Jan 29th 2001 work really hard in the dungeon